Of Drumbeats and Heartbeats

I have this very dear friend, who is also my fellow female bassist. Not only is she quite a talented musician, but she can say a simple sentence that will have such a profound effect on you that you start to ponder over your life. One particular Sunday, as we were having our usual post-church girl time, she said, "become an amazing drummer". *screeeeeeeeeeeeeeech!*

Before these four words, that would change the meaning of my life, were uttered, I mentioned in passing how I find a drummer that she used to play with somehow attractive. I thought this was just one of those "that guy is fine, swoon, and move on with our lives" moments. But alas, it was not such. This particular drummer that we were not moving on from, I had only heard him play twice. That, and I'm sure he wouldn't remember my face if we met on the street. Yet, this is how I apparently looked talking about him...

As it turns out, Mr Twice-Heard isn't special. I have an extra long list of people I find attractive, who are, umm, drummers. Not that any of them are particularly drop dead gorgeous. Well, not at least until I heard them play. The only prerequisite to my drummer-heart was simply to be a good drummer. Even Mr Bean would turn into David Beckham after giving me a noteworthy groove. Why?

My analysis:

I like to focus more on rhythm as I play, because I feel that a good rhythm can turn a basic bassline into something quite decent, like how Haron Waceke plays. He is never all over the fretboard, but when he is, it is at strategic points only, yet his rhythm is quite strong. For this reason, the person I pay the most attention to in the band is the drummer. I even practice basic rhythms on the drums so as to help me be a better bassist. This interest in rhythm is apparently not only limited to my band, but I find myself automatically analyzing the drummer when listening to any other band. So, while other girls notice the guy with the guitar, I notice the guy with sticks. Plus they say "your band is only as good as your drummer". There's something about a man in control.

Friend's analysis:

Drummers have something I don't. Quite true when we are attracted to members of the opposite sex, we are attracted to those who we perceive to have something that we don't have but admire. Not that I am an amazing guitarist, but while other girls swoon over guitarists, since I am a guitarist myself, I am unmoved because what they have is easily accessible. As a musician, one of my biggest struggle has been with rhythm, and even still have a problem with rhythms that are not simple timed. Thus and such, drummers it is.

Since being in a position where a man has emotional power over a woman is a dangerous position to be, my friend's solution was simple: become an amazing drummer. Then no one will move my heart to beat! (see what I did there?)